I got a very sweet letter this week from a lady who I guess has recently moved to our fair city... and is finding life a bit lonely.
It's a scenario that many people face I suppose. Especially in this case, because her significant other has come here to work, which leaves her at home trying to build a social circle from scratch.
It's the worst possible time as well, because so many of us kind of hibernate inside our homes chilling like fishfingers in the fridge while it's roasting outside. I offered some advice as to how she could maybe kickstart her social whirl but it really got me thinking about how friendships happen.
With the explosion of Facebooks and Bebos and MySpaces, I guess for many it's become very easy these days. For me, although having a FB profile, I have always preferred keeping it real more than virtual. If you were to judge me by the number of friends on my profile you might deduce that I am some kind of loner, because I don't see the point of collecting "friends" just for the sake of it.
I have enough people I know in real life that I don't find the time or the inspiration to keep in regular contact with. The last thing I need is the pressure of keeping up with strangers.
But I understand by seeing the amount of FB activity that my work colleagues find the time to do – that it certainly works for some! Friendship sometimes stems from the strangest sources in my experience.
For example, my two best mates in London have known each other since their school days. The flip being, that at that time they both went to different schools and were in rival gangs. They can now recount colourful war stories of how they remember throwing dustbin lids at each other during "disagreements" outside youth clubs… yet now we are all as thick as thieves! (Thick being the operative word, some might say).
When I come to think of it, most of my good friends have all punched me in the face at some stage, because I always managed to convince them to come boxing with me. One of my crew, a huge Palestinian brother called Ahmad Faour, who I nicknamed Rocky IV (Faour: Four!) cracked my ribs and nearly broke me in half, but I still know I have a friend for life.
We have arranged a rematch to help me level the score – I intend to stick a chocolate bar on my left glove to distract him so I can whup him with my right! For those who know me through the column it may not surprise you that outside of sparring, I have no problem making new acquaintances. More to the point, I find it really easy in Dubai, which I find to be an incredibly friendly place.
My personality is such that I find it real easy to approach people and strike up a conversation with my dashing wit and total lack of self-consciousness. I can break the ice like a sledgehammer at any social gathering with an inane question or wry observation.
I just figure what's the worst that can happen?
I have become aware that I possess the quality that children have, who I think are the best example to follow. For example while writing this, I am in a café watching Euro 2008, and there is an adorable little girl running between the tables, basically networking among all the football fans.
That's the way that life should be, don't you think? Give up the standing around, trying to be cool hiding behind our shades and flashy clothes… Just get up and say something!
This is especially true in the world of the singles. With a well-timed smile, maybe a subtle shake of the hips (hopefully in time to whatever music is playing), you will be surprised by what can happen. As one of England's most celebrated song-smiths wrote: "Nature is a language. Can't you read?"
And if all else fails – I am always here every Friday.
Your weekly mate...
